Shelter from the Storm
by Jeanne M
Summary: NEW CHAPTER!  Chapter 8 now uploaded.  A possible explaination for the apparent dissolvement of Wolverine and Jubilee's close partnership, and the consequences years down the road.....
1. Shelter from the Storm?

Usual: Characters? Not Mine. Money? None being made. This is written for my shelter. Consider it a possible explanation for why Wolverine would allow his partnership with Jubilee to just **END** like Marvel has let it...... Ever Onwards.......

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**Shelter from the Storm**

~ _Jeanne M_

  
  


_'Twas in another lifetime, one of toil and blood   
When blackness was a virtue and the road was full of mud   
I came in from the wilderness, a creature void of form.   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm."_

- Shelter from the Storm by Bob Dylan 

  
  
  
  


Do you know what it feels like to be the broken half of a pair? No, I don't think you do. It's not as if he's dead. 'Cause he ain't. I think this is worse- him being alive and all. I'm used to people dying. Hell, I'm even used to being abandoned, as awful as that sounds. But not by him. I never expected that he would leave me alone like this.

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I can hear her, ya know. Cryin' two floors above me, sittin' on the roof. My window's open. Yeah, I could get up and close it, but then she'd know I heard her muffled sniffles. And I've already hurt her enough for one lifetime, no need to go pricklin' her pride as well.

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It's just, I didn't mean it, ya know? Okay, so I'm a cold-hearted bitch who could never understand what he's had to face. Fine. It's probably true. But I NEVER meant to hurt him, in any way! He knew I was at school.....I couldn't just drop everything and run over to have grand adventures like we used to. And it's not like I meant to stop writing......I'm not the world's smartest girl, and trying to pass classes took up all of my time. I didn't mean to. I didn't. But I was thoughtless, careless, the typical airhead, and now I've lost my best friend because of that.

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Jeannie says I'm sulking. That I'm pouting 'cause my little girl went an' grew up on me. Yeah, the kid came when I really needed her, during the Death incident. An' I seen the security tapes of when she arrived, thinkin' I was dead. But it hurts, ya know? I thought that she would be the one person who would never abandon me. Guess I was wrong. She simply stopped answerin' my calls and letters, the silence stretched into months.

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I. Was. Wrong. Okay? I admit that. And I hurt the one person I care about more than anything else in the universe. But it's not like I meant to quit talking to him......Did you know I have a learning disability? Not many people know that. Jean, Emma, Remy, and Bobby. That's it. Which means extra lessons for yours truly. YOU try keeping up with correspondence when yer in classes from 7am until you collapse at 3 in the morning. It's not as if he was the only one I didn't respond to. Remy and Bobby never got answers, but you don't see them hating me. Not to mention all of the saving the world crap and defending our lives can take up a lot of a girl's time. But those are just excuses. Worthless. Because what I did has no excuse. Now that I think of it.......where the fuck was HE when I needed him? When I was trapped in a madman's hell? He's bitterly claiming that I left him, what about when I was missing for an entire six months, huh Logan?!?! How about when I was watching my friends and all of my dreams die?!? Where were you when Bastion was raping my soul?

Where were you?

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"Where were you?"

The words float down from the roof. Where was I????? Where was she! My light, my life, and my sanity. The person I swore I would never hurt. The woman who can calm my berserker rages and brings out the man in me. And she turned her back on me, going off to play and live the easy life with the kiddies. An' she's got the guts to ask where I was? So maybe I told her goin' to live with Frost an' Sean was a good idea. Yeah, I even said I was proud o' her for wantin' to learn how to control her powers. Chuck never really seemed to care much about teachin' Jubes, so I figured Sean and Emma would do what he either wouldn't or couldn't do. See, the kid's a walking bomb. An' someday she's gonna blow. I think it would be better for everyone if she knew how to control the explosion.

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I hate him for doing this. Tearing me inside out and claiming my still beating heart. Because it always has been and always will be his. Gods above, I hate him! 

So why is the longing for his voice still in my soul?

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I hate her for doin' this. For givin' up and going to live far away. For moving past everything that has happened to her, and growing into a beautiful person.........without us. For provin' that my 'lil darling doesn't need a partner, she doesn't need anyone to survive. Most of all, I hate her for lettin' the spark go out of her eyes. There's not the fire in her luminous blue eyes that there used to be, and I have to quell every animal instinct in me that's screamin' she's a dangerous stranger.

So why do I want to go out on the roof and ask if she's got a light?

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I hate him! I hate him I hate him I hate him!!!!! He won't acknowledge me, he won't talk to me, it's like I don't even exist for him! I think that's the worst part. I could stand it if he was angry towards me or if he was yelling. It ain't like I haven't been screamed at or hit around before. But his indifference, the way his gaze just passes over me......

.....it's breaking me a hell of a lot faster than Bastion, Creed, Viper, or anyone else ever could.

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She doesn't need me anymore, and it hurts like a bitch.

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He doesn't need me anymore, and it's killing me inside.

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I miss my partner.

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I want my friend back.

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And in the living room, a red-haired woman weeps for two lost souls who have hurt their other half so much, and hopes that they can survive the pain.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Non Omins Moriar............  



	2. Wandering in the Storm

Usual: Money? None Here. Characters? Not Mine. Song belongs to Bob Dylan. Everything else belongs to whomever owns it. I plan on eventually writing one chapter to go with each verse of this song, so stay tuned for future details. Don't worry, I won't do anything to the characters that their owners wouldn't do..... And in traditional Jeanne style, Ever Onwards.........  
  
**_telepathy_**  
_words that the speaker emphasizes_  
*************************** = a change in the speaker (same as last chapter)  
  


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**Wandering in the Storm**  
_Jeanne M._  


_And if I pass this way again, you can rest assured   
I'll always do my best for her, on that I give my word   
In a world of steel-eyed death, and men who are fighting to be warm.   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm."_

Shelter from the Storm by Bob Dylan  
  
  
  


I'm outta here. I can't stand the reproach in everyone's eyes. 'Ro, Jean, Remy, hells, even Hank has pulled me aside and said I was behaving like a kid! Me! 

They say I'm killing her.

I just brushed 'em all off. Ain't none of 'em ever understood the relationship between me an' Jubilee. She's my partner, my lifeline, or at least she used to be. The kid got tougher, she got hard and cold, and she doesn't need a sentimental old fool like me around anymore. And I admit, she's got me spooked. Ever since I found her after she escaped that hellhole in Arizona, she's had me spooked. There's a shadow in her eyes, and a sharpness to her movement. Shit, even her scent has changed! The girl became a predator to escape being prey, and just being around her gives me the creeps.

But when 'Ro came to me with tears in her eyes, I finally had to listen. Well, she's stopped eating. And stopped attending Danger Room sessions. In fact, she's started avoiding any activity where I'm likely to be. 'Ro says they barely managed to drag her in for a physical last week, and Jubilee has lost almost twenty pounds since she came back to the mansion. Ororo is not a woman to waste words, an' she flat out said I was breaking Jubilee's heart.

I told her that she'd have to have one for that to happen.

And Ororo slapped me.

I still can't believe she did that, but she did. Didn't even rub her hand afterwards or anything. Just slapped me so hard my head snapped backwards. It hurt like a bitch. Once the room stopped spinning, I was aware of a _very_ upset goddess looming over me. An' let me tell ya, folks, 'Ro is not a woman ya want to mess with.

"Are you done feeling sorry for yourself yet, Wolverine?" The words were hissed so low I almost missed them. "In your selfishness, you are killing your Jubilation! She needs you, Logan, now more than ever. You were willing to help Kitten face her dark side after the ordeal with Orgun, but you are willing to abandon Jubilee to her demons? You claim to be a man, my friend, but you are behaving like a spoilt child!" She took a step closer, and I found my self backing up. "We've all known for a long time that Jubilation has some sort of psi talent, but she has it so tightly locked away that not even Jean, Emma, or the Professor could open it up. Well, at her physical Hank found miniscule changes in both mind and body, associated with the emergence of mid-level psionic talent. He thinks that her latency is beginning to stir, and become something more than her current psionic cloaking and shielding. And she's trying to bury it again because all she's picking up is your repugnance and fear!"

"I ain't afraid of her!" The words are out before I think. "Why the hell should I be afraid of a punk kid, _especially_ Jubes?"

"Because it is Jubilee, Logan. And you no longer know what she is capable of. She grew into a woman while we weren't watching, Logan, and now there's a stranger sitting at the table where our laughing sparkler used to be." Ororo looked at me with sympathy, eyes losing their hard edge. "Please, talk to her. Stop pretending that she doesn't exist!" Her hand gently brushed the already healing bruise on my face. "You really _are_ killing her, Logan, physically and spiritually. It's still Jubilation, even if her changes do seem a little frightening at times. Bright Lady knows that sometimes her eyes scare me, but you don't see it stopping me from loving her." She smiled softly, and turned to go, feet treading softly on the grass.

"She was too young to become an X-Man, 'Ro. I never shoulda brought her here."

'Ro paused, head tilting to one side. "Actually, Logan, I think Jubilee was too old to be an X-Man. That has always been her greatest difficulty. It's very similar to my experience after the Siege Perilous. She was an adult trapped in the body of a child, she'd seen and been through too much. When you met her, Jubilee could not Dream, and she could not trust. Somehow, someway, she learned to trust you, but unfortunately you have not lived up to that honor." With that, she glided back towards the mansion. 

So I'm leaving. I told Chuckles to holler if things got too hot, but otherwise I needed to clear my head. That man's silences can speak volumes. He simply nodded, and I left his office. If I'm hurting Jubes that much, then I gotta clear out for a bit. If her psi is really wakin' up, then it's better for everyone involved if I'm not here. I don't wanna be the reason she represses her own abilities. I don't think I could stand knowin' that she stunted that beautiful mind of hers because of what's leakin' out of mine.

My heart tells me that she's still my Jubes, an' I just wanna scoop the kid up in a huge hug. But I'm too afraid that the animal inside will sense the rival predator and try to hurt her. 'Cause that's what she feels like to my senses, not like a teammate/pack-mate, or partner/pack-second, or even daughter/cub. She feels dangerous, and I don't wanna accidentally turn on her during a fight.

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No no no no no no noooooooooo! I feel the deadness in my heart grow a bit as I watch him throw the duffle on the motorcycle. Not again. Oh please, by all the Gods above, not again. 

I don't want to be left alone again.

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Ororo hears the motorcycle start, and hangs her head.

"Bright Lady forgive me, I failed." Her voice is a whisper, and as her eyes mist over clouds begin to gather overhead the house. "I fear the price of my failure tonight, oh dear Goddess!"

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I can sense Jubilee watching me, it raises hackles on my back. I look up to her window, but the light is out and the curtains drawn. For some reason, I decide to look up farther. And there she is. Silhouetted against the sky, standing at the edge of the roof. The wind has picked up, whipping her black trenchcoat like a fluttering banner and sending her long hair flying around her face. Her face. It looks carved out of stone, and I swear that her eyes are glowing faintly.

**_Go then, Logan-san, if you are so scared of me._** I feel the contempt in her mind-voice, and it takes all my willpower not to jump on the bike and drive like hell. **_If you are unwilling to face what I represent, you should leave_.** 

"When did you learn that trick, kid?" I know she can hear me, despite the rising wind.

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I can do this. I can do this. I don't think I could handle it if he leaves me again. But if I'm the one who does the leaving, who breaks the tie, maybe I'll be able to stop the pain. Maybe. I don't want to, I don't! But I won't let him crush me again. I don't want to be hurt again. So I'll hurt him instead.

**_Does it matter?_**

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**_Does it matter?_** Her voice echos eerily in my skull. **_You've made it abundantly clear that you don't give a shit about me now that I don't need you for protection. So why don't you get on your bike and go to whatever bar you were thinking of to get a nice beer and a cheap girl?_** It's a resounding coldness in my mind, as if her words are little puffs of frost. **_Later, Wolverine._** With that, she vanishes. One moment she's there and the next.....gone. I shudder and hit the gas. Time to get the hell away from her. It's only until I'm in a seedy place about fifty miles from the school do I realize that at the end, she called me by my codename. For some reason, the room suddenly feels a whole lot colder.

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I slump against the chimney, my head aching from that small use of telepathy. Maybe I burst a blood vessel and I'll die of internal head injuries. I could only be that lucky. I watch him pull past the gate and start laughing. I just keep laughing and laughing. Nothing's funny, nothing at all. I keep laughing.

"Jubilation?" I twist around to see Ororo standing by her skylight. "Would you like to come inside? The winds are getting dangerous, and I prefer to interfere with Nature only when I have no other choice."

"Yeah. Thanks." I pull myself up and head towards her. Ororo smiles at me, and brushes hair out of my eyes as she places an arm around my shoulders. That's when I start to cry. 

  
  



	3. Respite from the Storm

The Usual: Characters? Not Mine. Money? None Being Made. Song belongs to Bob Dylan. Tendo Aika, a.k.a. Kitsune, belongs to me (with a nod to Rumiko Takahashi for the last name, and a personality based on my friends Stace and Anna.) Everything else belongs to whomever it belongs to. Note: I have heard TWO different versions of this song as sung by Dylan, and I found TWO different versions of the lyrics for this verse. I decided to go with this version, as it just fits better. Takes place 5 years after the last chapter. That said, Onwards.

Spoken in Japanese

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**Respite from the Storm**  
_ Jeanne M._  
  
  
  


_Not a word was spoke between us, there was little risk involved   
Everything up to that point had been left unresolved.   
Try imagining a place where it's always safe and warm.   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm." _

Shelter from the Storm by Bob Dylan  
  
  
  


The meditations, the katas, training, I haven't felt this good in years. I feel cool, cleansed, in control of myself and the events around me. 

Sensei, however, is sitting beside me trying to find the words that I can understand. The lady scares me shitless. Tiny, frail-looking woman in her late nineties, close as I can guess. She's got a soft voice like silk that sheathes a steel blade. An' these cold, blue eyes, that look right into yer soul. Not ta mention that the lady is the only person alive that can kick my ass faster than I can blink.

Your mind is not on your work, pupil. Whatever distracts you, face it and move past. At first it was your focus, now it is ruining concentration. Her sharp eyes bore into me. Fearless blue orbs hold mine in an unbreakable gaze. Name your fear, Logan.

I fear nothing. I try to ignore her and sink into the meditation. It doesn't work. I fear no creature or man.

Then it is a woman. Damn her! She must be quite remarkable to cause such a disturbance.

A couple of women, Sensei. And they are more than remarkable. She gives a snort of laughter at that. What's so funny?

You and women, Logan. I swear, you haven't changed a bit. Let me guess. You can't find the words, they can't understand, and everyone gets upset. Her eyes crinkle in amusement. And I thought it was a serious problem.

Dammit, Aika, this _is_ serious! Instantly, I find myself laying on the ground, her dainty fingers resting against lethal pressure points. Wha?!?

It is Sensei, Logan. I am the teacher now, not one of your girls. Her voice is perfectly calm, her scent carries no trace of anger, but I remain still. To you, I am no longer Tendo Aika. I am either Sensei, or you may call me the Kitsune. And you are being ridiculous. You_ and_ your women. She moves aside, an' I hastily jump to my feet, glowering.

You don't understand the situation, Sensei.

Take that tone with me again, and you are out of this dojo faster than I just put you on the floor. She gives me an annoyed look, and gestures for me to sit again. You've been in and out of my life since I was a small child, Logan. I have seen you in the various stages of your life, and the women that pass through that life like a feather on the wind. Strong willed and tempestuous, all of them. Not a single one has been a weakling. However, the fact remains that they come and go like the tide. You are a man who does not know his own soul, how can you understand that same restless spirit in another?

Women do have a disturbing tendency to die on me, Sensei. 

My sarcasm is not lost on her, she simply chooses to ignore it. That they do. They are ultimately mortal, you know. With all the mortal faults that entails. She looks at me with a small grin. You love them despite these human flaws, because they speak to both the Man and Beast within you. 

This is not a new understanding for me, Tendo Sensei. I know I'm sulkin', but I can't help it.

Then perhaps you should listen harder. Her voice is a stinging whip, an' I find myself wincing. Your problem, _Wolverine_, is that after all this time you assume. You assume your women will understand you. You assume that only you know how bad things can be. You assume that you are the best at what you do. You are _not_ always the best, and when that happens, you cannot understand. The comrades do _not_ always understand, and you become resentful. Sometimes, the fabric of your life unweaves itself, and you clamp down at the first sign of change to try and stop it from unraveling. You never realize that for a new pattern to be added, the tapestry must first shift shape and size. She waves her hands, sketching lightly in the air. I know someone else who does that. I do not say your women are guiltless here. They share the blame as well. You are all being so dense! Aika Tendo fixes me with such a frozen glare that I want to run. Very very far away. Have none of you ever heard of communication?

I blink. Sensei?

Sensei sensei sensei. What? Do you not understand the word? Has your Japanese gotten that bad? Want me to switch to English? She taps her fingers against my head.

I shudder, remembering Aika's lacking command of the English language. I understand the word, Sensei.

No, you think that you comprehend the meaning of the word. You do not _understand_ it, or we would not be having this conversation. She gives me an indulgent look. None of you have bothered to communicate, and it has sent everything spinning into a huge crisis for all of you.

You are not aware of the whole story, Sensei. With all due respect, you have no idea what we think and feel, and you do not know what we say to each other.

"Obviously, Logan, I have some idea." 

English. Aika can't speak English. But the words issuing from her mouth are smooth, with no trace of an accent. Only the wicked glint in her eyes gives away the fact she knows I am shocked. Since when?

She knows what I mean. "If you had bothered to talk to me, to communicate with me more often, you would know I could speak English. Dear Gods, Logan! I went to the University, of course I can speak English! You only remember the little child, the wild teenager, and the dojo elder, you never bothered to ask me about the rest of my life. Oh, you knew that I went away to school, and that I got good marks, but you didn't ask. And I did not tell." She folds her hands, eyes looking out at the horizon. "I was never one of your women, Logan, and that's how I can say these things to you. You find kindred spirits, wandering in this world. Together you fight as one, thinking you have found a soul made of the same starstuff as yours. However, they take that to mean that you understand them, and you assume they understand you. It is those naive ideas that get you into so much trouble. You know each other inside and out, deep in the root of your beings, but you cannot understand each other because you don't talk. That's how misunderstandings happen, Logan. How many women is it this time?"

"Two." I can't stand the pity in her eyes. "When did you get to be so old?"

"I've been old since I was born, you know that. So you have two ladies this time...." She shakes her head. "You could make a fortune if you'd sell your secret." 

"It's my dark and handsome looks."

This time she acknowledges the joke, and laughs. "Don't forget that magnetic personality of yours!" For a moment I see a glimpse of the Aika I used to know, then she's gone and Sensei is left. "You and these two indomitable women need to sit down and have a chat. I only pray that you have not all suffered too greatly already, and that the wound is not beyond healing." She rises, and I know the audience is over. "You may stay at the dojo for a while longer, until you find your words. I recommend that you think carefully, my old friend. Your's is not the only pride that has been wounded. Choose your words wisely, but do not take too long in meditation on them. Heal the wound before it festers." She glides away, silently, leaving not a trace of her presence behind. I really want to know how she does that. I didn't train Aika, she found her way despite our friendship, not because of it. Training runs in the family blood, and Aika is quite possibly the best of the best. I settle down to meditate. Maybe it's time for another trip to the School, it's been awhile since the last one. Test the waters. Talk to Ororo, Xavier, Hank.

If they'll let me, I want to talk to Jean, too. 

I dunno about Jubes. The kid hurt me, whether she meant to or not. I've visited the Mansion a few times since that night, but always when Jean and Jubilee were both gone. 'Ro told me once that Jubilee usually throws a fit and breaks a few things once she realizes I've been and gone. Beats up on Scooter, too. I know that she's tried to find me, and before I came to the dojo last year I'd had to leave a couple of towns in a big hurry to avoid a questing Jubilation.

It's time for another visit to the school, start to clear accounts with the team.

But my partner's just gonna have to wait until I can get that done and my head clear. B'sides, dealing with Jubilee always requires all of my wits, that kid's wicked sometimes. But in all the fun ways.

My dream love, my best friend, and my partner. Jean, Ororo, and Jubilee. Guess I lied to Aika, there's three of them this time. Only Ororo understands all of us, and she's been tryin' to bring us back together for years. Going back. It sounds so odd.....welcome.

So I retreat into breathing exercises, reaching for the elusive inner peace. Sensei said I'd have to find my words on my own, and I will. 


	4. Eye of the Storm

Usual: Characters? Not Mine. Money? None Being Made. Un-named student belongs to me (I guess). Everything else belongs to They Who Own It. Even if They are doing a $#@&*! job...... This operates under the assumption that 5 years later, some of the X-Men have left, and new ones moved in. Kate Pryde, Emma Frost, and Bobby Drake are all living lives outside the Mansion and the world of X. This one is shorter than the others, it's a mini chapter. Onwards.

*********************************** = change in speaker

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**Eye of the Storm  
**_Jeanne M_.  


_I was burned out from exhaustion, buried in the hail,   
Poisoned in the bushes an' blown out on the trail,   
Hunted like a crocodile, ravaged in the corn.   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm." _

Shelter from the Storm by Bob Dylan  
  
  
  
  


Whatever asshole said that time and distance heals any wound, was a lying son of a whore. Hmm......wait, that would have been Xavier. Charles needs to learn how to think before he speaks, you'd think someone with his brain size woulda figured that out on his own.....unless it's all ego like I been saying for years. Shit. It's been five years, and I can't get those eyes out of my head. The pain that flashed briefly behind those eyes as the wind screamed in sympathy with my heart. I make no apologies. I did what was necessary to protect myself. If I had just let Logan ride off into the night, never to be seen again, I think it would have killed me. I'm not a fool, I know he visits when I'm not around. I'll come back from visiting Pryde, Popsicle, or Frost, and I'll smell him. It doesn't take heightened senses or anything- it's quite a distinctive scent- cheap whiskey, expensive cigars, faded flannel, and cedar trees. He's come here maybe three times since that night. 

And I smell him all over the place right now.

Admittedly, I usually don't take it very well when I discover he's been sneaking around. It involves me throwing one of my "tantrums" as Scott has taken to calling them, and storming into Xavier's office to ask very icily if they were going to bother to tell me that Wolverine had stopped by. Charles just looks at me with those sad eyes of his, taking in my disheveled and travel-worn gear, and states softly that yes, _Logan_ had been on the grounds, but had already left. He never fails to stress the name, as if to counter my full use of his codename. Logan hasn't been Wolvie or Wolvester in a very long time.

This time, however, I can't work up the anger to accompany one of my infamous explosions of temper. The newer kids are watching me suspiciously, I suspect that Scott told them to stay out of my way until Ororo could get me calmed down. They're all waiting for me to start detonating things. I just smile thinly, making my way to Charles's study.

** Professor, are you busy? ** I tap lightly on the sturdy oak door out of courtesy.

** Come in, Jubilation. ** 

I push the door open to find him sitting behind the desk reading the Times. "How may I be of service?"

"He was here again, wasn't he." It isn't a question, and there is no venom in my voice. "The Wolverine."

"Yes Jubilee,_ Logan_ was here for a brief time." Ta da! He did it again. "Unfortunately, I could not convince him to stay with us."

"I suppose he left moments before my bike came racing up the frontage road?" I sit down in one of the huge leather armchairs and sigh. "Don't bother to answer, Charles. I think I already know the answer. How does that man do it?"

"I am not quite sure, his ability to leave in just enough time to avoid you completely greatly disturbs me." Charles pushes his paper to the side and studies me over his hands. How I hate it when he does that! "I sense that you are not as hostile as you usually are after such an occurrence. Has something changed?"

My laugh is bitter, tired. "You 'sense', Xavier? You mean the fact I'm not blowing things up or snarling at Scott wasn't a hint?" I tug my hair out of it's ponytail and let it fall loose. "I'm tired. I'm fucking exhausted at being angry at him for hurting me. I can't work up the energy to care about how he abandoned me, abandoned all of us! I've waited and waited for him to come back, I've been bending over backwards for a long time trying to get some word of him, and all I get is silence and hostility. For the first time in my life, I've got some sense of purpose. _I'm in control_. Of my powers, my life, everything. For once I'm happy, and the only thing that's missing is my best friend, the one person who understands me better than anyone else here- including telepaths. Logan is missing. We both made mistakes, I admit that. And Gods above know I've tried to atone for mine. But I'm getting discouraged, Charles. I can't wait for him forever, or I risk losing everything I've fought so hard for." I stand, brushing off my jeans. "Is that what you wanted to know?"

"In a sense, yes. However, I would argue that you do not yet have full control of your powers. Your abilities continue to elude definition, it shifts in subtle ways that Henry and I do not understand. You are a wildcard on the team, Jubilation, and we cannot depend on you because we do not know what you are capable of!" Xavier is giving me the 'I'm very disappointed in you' look. "You don't conform to teamwork, Jubilee."

"Like I said, Professor. I'm the one in control for once. I didn't say _you_ were in control, I said that I was." I give him my sweetest smile and walk out, shutting the door behind me. Dealing with that man is almost as taxing as..........no, better off not thinking down that path. I walk swiftly past whispering students and teammates, heading towards the kitchen. I need food.

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I don't hear doors slamming, screaming, or anything igniting. That means that either Jubilee has decided to remain calm, or she doesn't know that Logan was here. I laugh softly to myself; the world must have come to an end, Jubilation Lee was keeping a reign on her temper. As long as she's spent honing her battle-skills, there is no way she cannot know that he was here. And knowing my friend, she has gone to drown her sorrows in her own time-honored fashion.

Double Fudge Vanilla Swirl Ice Cream.

I head to the kitchen, frowning sternly at lurking students who I know are just waiting around to see Jubilee pick a fight with Scott. I don't have the heart to tell them that she's probably going to be too full of sugar to be mad at anyone. I enter the kitchen, and instantly repress the laughter that bubbles up. Jubilee is sitting on a barstool in the corner, still wearing her dust-covered trenchcoat, motorcycle helmet dangling from the freezer handle, and the entire carton of ice cream is wedged into her lap. She waves a spoon at me and grins.

"Greetings and Salutations, Ororo! Care to indulge with me?"

"You sound like Hank, my friend." I deftly snag a spoon out of the drawer, and drag a chair over to join her. "Did you leave any of that for the rest of us?"

"Gee, and here I thought I had the whole Christian Slater thing going for me!" At my blank look, Jubilee twirls her spoon and digs deeper into the ice cream. "It's from the movie Heathers. He's a psychopathic pyro with a yen for mass death and destruction. I was watching it this weekend with Emma." Her eyes flicker to the door and a smile flits across her face as she winks at me. Jubilee clears her throat and raises her voice a notch. "I was thinking of re-enacting some of the scenes in the Danger Room later, but why wait?" The whoosh of air as our listeners rapidly depart is enough to stir the windchimes that Jean has hung over the doorway. Jubilee just rolls her eyes and dives back into the ice cream. "Maroons."

***********************************

'Ro says that she's doing good. She said that I'd be real proud o' Jubilee, that the kid's finally got her life together. She can apparently kick some serious bad-guy ass, and likes to take her frustrations out on the Danger Room. 'Ro was tellin' me about all the times that Jubilee has wiped the floor with Cyke during the one-on-one sessions, usually without using her powers. 'Ro also said that if I didn't stick around, for good, she was going to fry my sorry ass and let Jubilee kick the shit out of the rest.

Ororo says that I need to come home, or I'll risk losing my Jubilation forever. Sometimes she's so alien from the girl I first towed to the Mansion, that 'Ro doesn't recognize her.

I don't know if I can do it. This canucklehead doesn't know how to deal with a twenty-something girl with an attitude problem. What if she still hates me? 

What if she just doesn't care anymore?

*********************************** 

I can't claim to know what happened, I wasn't here then. I came to the school last year, but I've heard all about Him. Logan, Wolverine, Patch, whatever you want to call Him. All the kids know about the Scott/Jean/Logan thing, and we've heard stuff about how He and Jubilee used to be great friends, and now they can't be around each other. It's like how the polarization of a magnet repels itself. Storm knows what happened, but she won't tell us. She always just says that a lot of things happened in a short amount of time, and it left people confused and upset. Lots of people got hurt and died and came back, but everything was all wrong afterwards.

I just hope they get it right. Watching Jubilee pick on Scott during training is fun, but the tension whenever His name is brought up just gets old after awhile.

***********************************

I still miss him so much.

***********************************

He hesitated this time, but left anyway. Bright Lady, when will we stop hurting ourselves this way?

***********************************

Despite my absence, these are my teammates. After all this time, I shouldn't feel hesitant about any of them. Well, I can still be suspicious of Remy. That charm and the accent of his just bothers me.......

I talked to Jean without losing it. I even talked to Scott.

But I still won't directly face Jubilee. I watched her enter the house from afar, I had left just in time. I watch her, and wait. Not yet. I can't talk with her yet. Maybe later.

***********************************  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Four down, Ten verses to go.........  
**Omnia Mutantur, Nihil Interit.**  
_'Everything changes, but nothing is truly lost.'_


	5. Interlude -- Stormbreak

Usual: Characters? Not Mine. Money? None being made. Feedback greedily eaten up, and flames used to make smores. I promise, I'm not treating them any worse than the rightful owners do. That said, Onwards!

Note: Shelter from the Storm is it's own continuity. It does NOT intersect with any other stories I have running. There are no spoilers here. 

* * *

Suddenly I turned around and she was standin' there   
With silver bracelets on her wrists and flowers in her hair.   
She walked up to me so gracefully and took my crown of thorns.   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm." 

- "Shelter from the Storm" by Bob Dylan  
  
  
  
  
  


Interlude - Stormbreak  
By Jeanne M.  
  
  
  


"Get Out." The words were low, hissed, as she looked at him through luminous eyes. "Just get out."

**Spark, luv, please.....** He reached for her, the eyes she loved above all else looking like she had just ripped his heart out. **Listen to me.**

"GET OUT!" The last syllable ended in a shriek and the air around her detonated uncontrollably. "You're the one who apparently doesn't want to be here anymore, so get the hell out of my room!" Body quivering with barely controlled despair, her harsh laughter filled the room. "You said you loved me! Hell, Jono, you proposed to me! And now you're dumping me?!? Please, tell me how that's 'love', 'cause I'm missing something here." She brushed the tears out of her eyes, mouth twisting cynically. "You love me so much that you're dumping me. That doesn't make much sense, lover. Oh, wait, would it have anything to do with the fact that Paige just HAPPENED to call and NEEDS you to come back to Massachusetts? Fuck you Jono. Does the last few years mean that little to you?" She sighed, and all the anger seemed to drain from her, as she slid down the wall, covering her face in her hands. Her voice soft and broken. "Does our love mean that little to you, or was I just the replacement the whole time? Please, leave? Get out. Just.....get the hell out of my room."

He hesitated, then nodded once. **I didn't mean ta hurt you, Spark. I love you. I do. But.....this is better for us. Trust me, please? Believe in me?** He waited, but she didn't move, didn't acknowledge his presence in any way. **I'm sorry, Sparkle.** With one last look at the girl huddled on the floor, he left, softly shutting the door behind him.  
  


*****  
  


She had waited until she felt Jono leave the mansion grounds before she left her room at all. He reclined against the chimney, fishing for his pack of cigarettes with one hand while he shuffled cards with the other. He had been trying to get her to come downstairs and eat something for the past two days, but she had just shook her head and shut the door. The only times she left were to wander down to the lake or vanish into the forest. Human company she shunned completely, not that he could blame her. The way she had been yelling, by now the whole school would know what happened. Jubilee did not want to deal with the overload of sympathy at all, but there was no way she could have handled it while Jono was still on the grounds. Remy lit his cigarette and leaned back against the chimney. Jubilee and Jono had been perhaps one of the most stable (and happiest) X-couples ever, and the entire household was still reeling from his hasty retreat to Massachusetts. Emma had apparently slammed the door in his face when he first arrived, and had refused to open it. Paige had been forced to let him in the backdoor. Not a good sign. Despite the fact he had been gone the better part of a week, Jubilee still refused to eat anything or speak to anyone besides him and Stormy. Remy grit his teeth in frustration. Dat woman was quickly fading into a ghost, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Something had died in her when Logan had split, and now the rest of her had been snuffed out. Her beautiful blue eyes were the glassy stare of a dead woman. Remy's stomach churned at the image, and he desperately exhaled his smoke. He missed le petite. Admittedly, he didn't like it when she and Jono were engaged, something about their relationship bugged him. They had never argued, and he couldn't recall a single time that Jubilee had gotten angry at Jonothon. Remy shuttered. They had been almost too perfect, and Remy knew damn well that wasn't healthy. 

His ears pricked up at a slight creak, and he turned to see Jubilee standing behind him, a bottle of Xavier's brandy in one hand and two glasses in the other. At his raised eyebrow, a smirk crossed her face as she raised the glasses. "Is this a private party? If so, I'll take my guests and leave."

"Merde woman. Dat be Xavier's stuff. If he finds dat missing, dis thief is the one who's gonna get blamed."

"Then you might as well help me drink it." She saluted him ironically, settling down beside him on the roof. "I hate how everyone still treats me like I'm still fucking thirteen years old." She shakes her head, a chuckle escaping her. "I've been old enough to drink for years, and Jean still gives me hell about it. She still sees me as the baby."

"Not everyone sees you as de team 'baby', p'tite. Remy for one knows you be a woman grown."

Jubilee laughed, fluttering her eyelashes at him. "Why thank you, Remy. I appreciate that."

"Non, don' give me that! Remy thinks that you must been a pretty rowdy little fille, I bet you gave your parents hell." At that she nods, raising her glass in a toast. "But Remy thinks you been 'adult' Jubilee for a long time, you just pretended not to be. You had to wait for your body to catch up to your mind."

"Rem, that is quite possibly the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me!" She smiled at him, the first real smile he'd seen out of her since the breakup.

"It be da truth. Now, you gonna share dat, or do I tell Xaiver about your new-found talent for bypassing locks?"

"Phhht. Ya just needed to ask." She passed him the bottle and spare glass while she swished the brandy in her own glass. "And who says that it's a new-found talent?"

"Not me. Never underestimate the wiles of a beautiful woman, or any woman for dat matter. Dat's Remy's new motto." At that she grins again, white teeth flashing quickly before she shoots back the remaining brandy in her glass. "P'tite, how much of dat have you already had tonight? No offense, but you're actin' strangely, even for you."

"Flattery will get you nowhere, Cajun. And I haven't had nearly enough." 

Remy just nodded, refilling her glass in a silent salute. The grim set to her eyes announcing the conversation to be over. So they sat in silence, watching the parade of stars against the cloudless sky.

*****  
  
  
  
  
  


End Interlude.


	6. Lightning Flashes

Usual: Characters? NOT MINE. Money? NONE BEING MADE. All things belong to those who own them. I haven't read any Marvel in the past two years, so I don't know who's currently on what team or what their latest angst-issues are. So consider this a slight AU, since I don't claim to have a clue. With that, ever onwards.....

____________________________  


Lightning Flashes  
a Jeanne M. production  
  


Now there's a wall between us, somethin' there's been lost   
I took too much for granted, got my signals crossed.   
Just to think that it all began on a long-forgotten morn.   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm." 

"Shelter from the Storm" by Bob Dylan  
  


He winced as the older man slammed him into the wall. "Upset her and you die, understand? Right now you're the only person besides Ororo that she'll speak to, and if you fuck it up, I'll make you wish you'd died when Rouge left you in Antarctica." With that, Warren Worthington dropped Remy and stalked off, leaving Remy to rub his shoulder and glance questioningly at the aforementioned Windrider, who was scolding Warren on his communication techniques.

"Non. It's fine, Stormy. Warren's just wantin' to make sure Remy don' seduce the p'tite while her heart is still broken up." Remy shrugged his aching shoulder and grinned at the scowling Angel. "B'cause is well known dat Remy is a slut."

Warren scowled harder, and Ororo started laughing. A rich, musical sound that made him grin all the wider. "Remy, don't tease Warren. He's trying to be supportive of Jubilee."

"Den tell him to quit threatenin' me!" He fell to his knees throwing wide his arms in mock supplication. "For de love of God, 'Ro, tell de man dat Remy been living the life of a monk since he came to dis house! I ain't seduced nobody! Rougey don't want dis boy no more, an' Remy never laid a hand on a lady dat didn't want it! Heck, Remy been such a good boy, he's even stayed away from the femmes dat did want it!"

"Remy!" Ororo laughed harder as Warren managed to turn an even deeper shade of purple. "Remy LeBeau, I will admit you have not seduced anyone lately, but you are hardly a monk. You have neither the piety nor the self-deprecation necessary for such a lifestyle."

"Ouch." Remy fell foward, curling on the floor in mock agony. "Dat hurt, Stormy. Dat hurt dis boy." He suddenly sat up, grinning slyly as he crawled on his hands and knees towards Ororo. "I'll forgive only if you give dis boy a kiss."

"You are impossible!" Ororo wagged a finger at him as the two of them watch Warren stalk off in a huff. "And you wonder why you don't get along with the other male members of the team." She sat down beside him on the floor, a smirk still on her face. "You can be so juvenile at times."

"Ehn. Dey just worried dat their 'member' don't measure up to Remy's." He shrugged carelessly and leered at her, prompting another chuckle from Ororo. This time, however, she heard the muffled giggle underneath the sound of her own laughter, and her head snapped up to the figure at the top of the stairs. The soft laughter stopped abruptly, and Jubilee gave a brief wave before vanishing into the shadows in the upstairs hallway.

"How long was she standing there, Remy?"

"Since Warren came chargin' down the hall hellbent on makin' Remy a eunuch." He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Dat's why I played it up. She's been far too serious lately. De p'tite's gotta learn to laugh again, or she's gonna turn all bitter an' twisted, just like everyone else in dis damn house." He stood, helping Ororo to her feet. "No one's got any sense of perspective 'round here. For all dat Charlie is a shrink, everyone here just stews in their problems. Ain't healthy."

"And you're the model of how to pursue mental health?" Ororo's raised eyebrow elegantly underscores her skepticism. "My friend, your single-minded pursuit of Rouge has long convinced many of us that you are off the deep end."

"Dat's your opinion. I don't say anythin' about your relationships, Stormy. Don't go throwin' stones at mine." He grinned, giving her his biggest possible 'but I'm innocent' eyes he could possibly make, before strolling off down the hall.  
  


**********

He watched from the woods, lurking just beyond the treeline. The atmosphere seemed hushed, too subdued. He had seen his former teammates come and go around the yard all day, but hadn't caught a glimpse of her yet. It was a beautiful day. Sunny, warm, not a cloud in the sky. The type of day she loved to spend rollerblading around the grounds or swimming, but he hadn't seen her come out of the house. Everyone else was playing basketball, he watched as Bobby stole the ball from Scott, only to have it snatched away. Fear gnawed at his stomach- what if she didn't live here anymore? What if Jubilee had left, moved on, like Kitty? Logan watched Ororo exit the house, balancing a plate of sandwiches on one hand and carrying a pitcher of lemonade in the other, prompting a mass exodus from the basketball court to the picnic tables nearby. He heard her laugh, and watched as Remy stole two sandwiches from the plate as 'Ro scolded him. Logan couldn't hear the Cajun's reply as the man sauntered back into the house with his food, but the thunderous look on Worthington's face was priceless.

Logan stretched, shifting position to get a slightly better view. It hadn't been that long since his last visit, but for some reason he was hesitant to make his presence known. He glanced around, taking another assessment of which X-Men were in residence.

That's when he saw it.

The flapping of Remy's brown trenchcoat flickered in his peripheral vision. Logan looked up to watch LeBeau as he exited Ororo's skylight and made his way toward the chimney, both sandwiches still in his hands. He stopped by the edge, leaning over to rap on one of the windows. 

A few moments later a slight figure stuck her head out, then tossed a brown pack up and Remy caught it. She climbed into the window to swing her way onto the roof via the drainpipe, somersaulting her way away from the edge. Logan felt something give internally as he watched the woman chase Remy around the skylight, demanding her lunch. Jubilee. She was still living at the mansion, still an X-Man. Some of the rumors that had drifted his way had made him wonder if she would stay. It had sounded like she hadn't been getting along too well with Chuck, and 'Ro had wondered if maybe a vacation was what Jubilee needed more than anything else.

**********

"Damn you Remy, give me my sandwich!" Jubilee darted towards him and Remy sidled behind the chimney away from her.

"Non. Not until you promise to come downstairs and eat dinner with everyone tonight." He dangled the bribe at the end of his arm, swinging it back and forth. "Think the sandwich baggie could protect it if I decided to toss it off the roof?" A wordless shriek was the only reply as a now desperately hungry Jubilee chased him around the skylight. "All ya gotta do is have dinner downstairs, and this yummy sandwich is yours."

"Why should I? It's not like you're going to eat my sandwich if I refuse your irrational demands. That's my sandwich, Ororo made it for me. You don't even like cucumber and butter sandwiches!" She snatched greedily at it, but he yanked it away to hold it over the roof's edge. "Fine! I surrender! I'll go downstairs tonight and allow myself to be the object of very thinly disguised pity and eat Scott's very scary food. I will sit stoically and let people think very solemn thoughts about how sorry they are for me and how superior they are for not being in my situation, and I will keep a straight face and silently hate everyone for forgetting that I'm a fully-manifested telepath and I can 'hear' everything they are thinking since they aren't bothering to shield from me. And I will do all this for the sake of a cucumber and butter sandwich on white bread. Are you happy?"

"Oui." He tossed her the sandwich, making a face as she devoured it in two bites. "P'tite, how can you eat dat? Those are disgusting!"

"How can you smoke those foul cancer sticks or drink that nasty-ass beer?" She rolled her eyes blissfully as she licked the butter from her fingers. "Ah, the food of the Gods." 

"P'tite, dat's just nasty. Cut it out."

She grinned innocently, batting her eyes at him. "Wuss. I bet you're going to whine when I show you what beverage I brought for our rooftop picnic."

"Merde, not again woman. Don't you be gettin' Remy in any more trouble." A deliberately wicked grin was her only response as she tauntingly drew a shimmering amber bottle from her pack. "Dat's it. You're tryin' to get Xavier to kill dis poor Cajun boy."

"Chicken."

"Bitch."

"Man-whore."

"What?!?!?" Remy clutched at his heart, staggering backwards. "P'tite, I ask you not to get Remy in trouble by continuing to steal Xavier's very nice, expensive brandy, and you call him a....a....."

"Man-whore?" Jubilee supplied cheerfully. "But Remy, that's why all the girls like you. You're so easy to manipulate...."

**********

The sound of her laughter and his sputtered protests wafted faintly down from the roof, indecipherable to anyone without his enhanced senses. Now was not a good time. Maybe later. Maybe.......

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Not Done Yet......


	7. Tsunami

Usual: Characters? NOT MINE. Money? Don't got none. Everyone belongs to the company that owns them, and none of them belong to me! Except Kelsey McMannin, she's mine. She was the unnamed student-narrator in an earlier chapter, I've given her a name now! Whoo hoo! 

It's been about seven years since the first chapter took place. Xavier outed the school publically, and it is full of young mutants and the constantly shifting rooster of X-Men. Please remember, I told cannon to take a flying [BLEEP] about four years ago, so this does NOT fit with the current MU storyline. 

**Telepathy**  
((inner thoughts))  
//memories//

* * *

Tsunami  
  
  


Well, the deputy walks on hard nails and the preacher rides a mount   
But nothing really matters much, it's doom alone that counts   
And the one-eyed undertaker, he blows a futile horn.   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm."   
  
- "Shelter from the Storm" by Bob Dylan  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


"A note!" Her scream shrilled though the mansion, and the X-Men gave a collective wince. "A fucking note!" The sound of Jubilation Lee tossing things against her wall caused all of the younger students to run for cover, while the veterans of Westchester quickly convened in the Den. "Goddamnfuckingsonofabitchbastard!"

Ororo watched as Scott's jaw tightened at each echo of something smashing. He rubbed his eyes tiredly. "Jean, can you get anything out of her? What's going on?"

Jean shook her head almost immediately. "She's completely locked down. Whatever made her so angry, she took the emotional charge and has used it to tighten down her shields. If I didn't know exactly where to look for her, I never would have found her- she's almost totally psionically invisible. Once I did locate her psyche, her shields resemble the briar-wall from Sleeping Beauty. I'd get cut apart by the brambles before I even reached the walls." She sighed, leaning against the back of the couch as a BOOM softly resonated from upstairs. "If we want to know why she's blowing things up, someone has to go talk to her. Physically. In person." 

"Logan was here today." Remy walked into the room, carrying a box of Sugar Bombs. "P'tite got a note. He slipped in durin' the picnic. If you ask Remy, it's a pitiful excuse for a note. The homme just say 'alo. P'tite a little pissed 'bout his methods. She gave Gambit de box of cereal so she wouldn't "accidentally ignite perfectly good sugar." Jubilee will head down to de Danger Room in a bit, she just blowin' off some steam first."

Scott swore softly. "This has got to stop. It was bad enough when Logan was around, but this is absurd! He's not even here, and he's still hurting people!" The sound of something smashing echoed from upstairs, and everyone winced again. "And we need to get Jubilee into some anger management courses." Another boom shook the walls slightly as they heard Jubilee take the stairs two at a time and slam her way down the hall toward the Danger Room.

"You wanna be de one to tell le p'tite dat she gotta go to therapy?" Remy grinned from ear to ear as he began eating the Sugar Bombs. "Homme, Remy be takin' bets on de odds of your survival."  
  


*****  
  


Kick. Spin. Uppercut. Roundhouse. Flip. Slide. Duck. Punch. Slice. Twist. Throw. Jubilation Lee cut loose against the holographic SHIELD agents that the computer provided. Twirling her sais with glee, she ripped into the onslaught of opponents, the bracelet on her wrist effectively suppressing her explosive potential. This was to be a fight! She would not use her powers to make it easier on herself. Letting loose with a scream, she hurled herself towards her next group of would-be attackers, laughing the entire time.   
  


*****  
  
  
  


"And this, students, is what we call "Jubilee-with-a-deathwish". A.k.a.- something you are NEVER allowed to do." Emma Frost stared down at her one-time student, her eyes unfathomable. She had only recently been coaxed out of teaching retirement in recent weeks by Hank McCoy of all people. Scott and Xavier had been trying for years, but it was Hank who had said the magical words which had caused her to return to the mansion part-time. 

//There are things that only you can teach these children, Emma. They are tired, they hurt. Possibly more than those poor things from Genosha. Show them that it is possible to bend with the storm rather than break and shatter. Teach them beauty, Emma. Show them how to retain a pretense of elegance, no matter how ugly things get.//

((Oh Hank.)) Emma mentally shook her head. ((Appealing to my pride would be the typical tactic, but you had to go and appeal to my survival instinct. How very clever.)) She straightened up, looking at the six children peering out of the observation booth at her erstwhile apprentice. "Only Jubilation, the senior X-Men, and few members of X-Force are allowed to practice with the safety systems of the Danger Room off. And only Jubilation is foolish enough to wear a power suppresser while in the middle of a high-level training session. She is a pyrokinetic, as far as anyone can figure out, as well as a telepath. However, she prefers to rely on her physical strength, stamina, and fighting prowess in a battle. Can anyone tell me why?"

"Never give away the advantage." Kelsey McMannin kept her nose to the glass with a morbid fascination as she watched the older woman slit the throat of her adversary. "If they think she has a purely physical mutation, such as agility, they will not be expecting a pyrokinetic attack or telepathy at a crucial moment." The twelve-year-old reminded Emma eerily of Domino at times, with her fascination with violence. Unlike the other students in Emma's special class, Kelsey was the only one without an offensive power, and she tended to compensate by augmenting her physical and mental training. 

"Very good, Kelsey, but that is not the only reason." Emma moved foward to stroke the little girl's head. "Jubilee has had her powers stripped from her multiple times. She was a prisoner of O:ZT and her torture was overseen by Bastion himself." Her mouth tightened into a line of distaste at the memory as her new students gasped. "After that, she made an oath to never rely on something so delicate as a mutation. Your minds and bodies are weapons, just like your Gifts. Never neglect them. Come along, it will be a long time before she manages to wear herself out completely. You may come back to study her fighting techniques during your freetime if you wish." With that, Emma Grace Frost ushered her new charges out of the observation booth. Carefully prying Kelsey away from the glass, she propelled the little girl through the doorway with a firm hand. She would NOT allow these children to follow down the same destructive path that Jubilee seemed to twirl down with such fierce determination at times. Violence was all well and good in the proper context, but unless Jubilee learned how to bend soon, she was going to shatter all over again. Only it would be worse than what happened after Jono had left, and Emma had no doubt that if Jubilation Lee broke again, there would be a body count.

**I heard that, Em.** The thought coiled around Emma's mind, whisper-soft. **It's not nice of you to go around telling the kiddies that I'm nuts. They'll start to think I'm another Bishop, and I'm much more fun that he is.**

**Heaven forbid you ever take anything seriously.** Emma mentally shot back at the woman still below her in the Danger Room. **I thought you had your power-negating bracelet on?** 

**I did. I turned it off to 'talk' to you.** The mental chuckle twirled happy circles in her head. **I had the observation booth mike on. You were coming over the loudspeakers down here.** Jubilee laughed at Emma's mental swearing. **I know, I know. I'm a bad girl. I'm a bad, wicked woman who does her best to work around the rules instead of with them. Anything else?**

**I'm enormously proud of you for it.** The two women psionically smile at each other as Emma continues to walk down the hallway after her charges. **Are we still on for a movie in my quarters this evening? I recently acquired the entire James Bond dvd collection.**

**Emma, have I ever told you how much you are my personal hero?**

**Yes dear. Many times, usually after you borrow my platinum credit card.**   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	8. Stormclouds Moving

The Usual: Ya'll know this! Characters: MOSTLY NOT MINE. Tendo Aika is mine, but if you ask nicely you can borrow her. Money: NONE BEING MADE. 

The world has gotten darker, harsher, and it's no longer about equal rights for mutants, but about survival. More time has lapsed, and time is running out for our heros......I have not read any Marvel since before they killed Gen X, so continuity can take a flying _________. 

spoken in Japanese  
((Inner thoughts))

Note: Shelter from the Storm is a self-contained story. It does NOT intersect with any other stories I have running. It lives in its own little world. So don't worry, I'm not giving away plot spoilers for anything else while writing this. :)

***********************************************************************************************

  
  


I've heard newborn babies wailin' like a mournin' dove   
And old men with broken teeth stranded without love.   
Do I understand your question, man, is it hopeless and forlorn?   
"Come in," she said,   
"I'll give you shelter from the storm." 

- Shelter from the Storm by Bob Dylan

  
  
  
  


Stormclouds Moving   
Jeanne M

  
  
  
  


"Let me make sure I understand this...." Scott paces around, rubbing his temples, refusing to look at me. "The reason you got so upset last month is because Logan left a letter on your bed. You've been hunting down any trace of the man for the past few years, and then you get angry because he leaves you a letter. Now, you want my blessing to take a month off and go do God-Knows-What, which does *not* include looking for him? Jubilee, I really don't understand how your brain works." 

"Gee, join the club." I hide a sigh at his frown, and attempt to forge ahead. "First of all, Wolverine did not leave me a letter. He left a note, and all it said was 'Hello.' That is not a letter, that is an insult. I bent over backwards for a long time to set things right, and all he has to say for himself is 'Hello' ? I don't think so. I quit, Scooter. Finito. As Emma would say, I've reorganized my priorities. And seeking his approval isn't one of them. First off, I need a vacation. When I get back from basking on the beaches in Italy, my first and foremost care is the well-being of my students." I idly toy with the end of my braid. "I know what being the 'junior mascot' can do to a person. I'm not going to let these kids go through the same insulting, demeaning treatment that the X-Men put me through when I lived here. I will not let them be treated as idiots simply because they are young. They are intelligent, powerful, resourceful, and deserve to be treated as adults. They've earned that right. The 'team' is not my responsibility, neither is the Dream. You guys entrusted these teens to my care, and I'm going to do right by them. All I'm asking is for a month to make sure my head is in order before I dive back into the world of teenage angst."

"What if I say no?" He sits at the opposite end of the War Room table, folding his hands together. A rather transparent attempt to control the situation. "If you leave without my permission, then you can't come back, not for a very long time, if ever. Are you willing to risk that? You remember what happened when Kitty left, you will be cut off from your family, the only people who have ever cared about you."

"Bullshit." The man has got to learn how to play poker sometime, he's never learned the value of keeping your cards close to your chest. "You gave me guardianship over six students. Six people that none of you can control. You oust me, and you've got the potential for a mini-mutiny on your hands. Besides....." I lean foward, giving him my best evil-smile. "I'm taking Remy with me, if he wants to come. You get rid of the two people who challenge you with the most frequency and the most success for a month. That's a lot of nice quiet time for you. Your call, Scoot. Toss the troublemakers out for a month, or have us spreading dissent among the ranks." I grin wider, sliding back into my seat as he rubs his visor in exasperation. "Life's a bitch, ain't she?"

  
  


*****

  
  


"This solves nothing." Ororo is looking at me in disappointment. I don't meet her eyes. "Jubilee, are you even listening to me? You are being irresponsible and irrational."

"I need to go, 'Ro. I can't stay here any longer. This place has always been suffocating for me, you know that." I shove more clothes into my duffle, discarding anything with the school logo onto the floor. "There's too many ghosts here now. Too many have come and gone, with no difference made. Not to mention that Charles, Scott, and I just don't get along. I'm not the thirteen year old girl that came traipsing in here blowing bubbles and telling jokes, and I don't appreciate them treating me like I'm still her! Besides, it's not like I'm just taking off to go lay on beaches or anything, I'm actually on assignment. Scooter said that 'If I was going to be in the way, I might as well go get Logan to help me be a pain.' I don't like it anymore than you do, 'Ro, but it was the only way for me to get out of here for any amount of time. I can always say I couldn't find him, I never said how hard I'd look. Besides, Scooter says that we need him for tactical reasons- we're short a combat trainer, and we need someone who can teach how to 'brawl' effectively."

"We don't need a 'brawler,' Jubilee. Besides, I think that between Domino, yourself, Sean, and Jonothon, the X-family has enough hotheaded fighters. All of you are combat and weapons experts, Logan's absence is acceptable with so many apt replacements." 

"No absence is acceptable, not now when we need everyone we can get for this damned battle. But you'll excuse Logan because he's you friend." Now it's Ororo who won't meet my eyes, and I sigh. "You know it's true, 'Ro. Scott managed to knock it into my thick head that we need Logan the tactician as well as Wolverine the Fighter." I gesture to the crutch Ororo is leaning on to support herself. "We had too many get injured in that last furball, and we need all the support we can get. Our enemies are getting more desperate, and desperate people do dangerous things. I'm not going to risk the lives of my teammates just for the pride of one man. If Wolverine's presence will save lives, then if I find him then I'm going to drag him back here. Even if I have to use my "vacation time" to do it!"

She follows me around the room as I pack, staying a half-step behind me. "I understand your dedication, and it is admirable, but is it Logan you are trying to find, Jubilation? Or are you looking to run?"

"Ororo, I am a full-time member of the X-Men, something I used to dream about as a child. I've faced Brood, Sentinels, fanatics, out of control mutants, and a thousand other perils. Tell me exactly what you think I would be running from, 'cause I can't see how anyone could say I was afraid of something after all this time."

"Your failed relationship with Jonothon." 

To my credit, I don't even flinch or skip a beat. She sure doesn't pull her punches. "Jono and I are adults, 'Ro, and we're both mature enough to keep our personal problems separate from 'work'. Any feelings I have about Jonothon are just that. Mine. It's more than I can say about your relationships with Forge or Cable." I feel the anger rise in me, and shake my head. "All I'm doing is taking a vacation, and to justify it to Scott I'm going to keep my eyes and ears open for rumors. That's all. If I find Wolverine, that's all well and good. If not, oh well. So I have Scott yell at me. What's new about that? Besides.....if I do find him.....I may have fucked up royally, but even after all these years....he was my partner. I owe it to him to try and work this out."

"But not now!" The vehemence in her voice startles me. "You are needed here! You are correct, Jubilation. There is a war waging out there, and we need every fighter we can get. I would love to have Logan here, he would be invaluable. We need all the friends we can find, and having him here would be a great comfort to many people. But we need you here as well!" Ororo grabs my arm and forces me to look at her, white eyes boring into mine. "The younger generation looks to you, as much as you pretend not to notice. You defer to me as the leader of the Gold Team, but it's you they listen to. I know you've always hated being the 'youngest X-Man' and the 'baby' of the team, but they see you as their leader. The woman, the rebel against authority, who wears the X not because she agrees with Xavier's methods, but because she knows this is the best path. They are wary of us 'old timers' because we cannot know the world they have grown up in. A dark, vicious world, where peaceful co-existence is a fairytale, and only survival matters. You know that world, and so they follow you." She releases my arm, grasping her crutch for more support. "If you leave now, they will feel abandoned. You know what that feels like, don't make them go through what you did."

"You fight dirty, 'Ro." I'm shaking. I try to steady myself. ((Come on Jubes, Deep breath.)) "That was uncalled for."

"Jean is about to have a baby. I am injured, as are many others. You have barely begun to recover from severe emotional trauma. Besides Hank, you are one of the most competent in the medlab. You would sacrifice the mental stability of your students, your building of your friendship with Remy, and your responsibility to the X-Men because you can hear the wind calling? You are a restless soul, Jubilation. But don't let the wind drive you from one life to another. Listen to its song and embrace its freedom, but don't let the sky suck you in. I don't want to lose you to the same never-ending road that claimed Logan." 

  
  


*****

  
  


"Get out of my dojo" Aika is standing in the doorway, leaning on her cane. "I told you to meditate on your words, Logan. Not spend your time chewing them to death."

"Fer an old lady, yer damn impatient."

"It's 'you are damn impatient sensei.' We already had that lesson once, didn't we Logan?" Her smile holds vicious amusement. "Do you need a review session? I know you like getting rough with women, but do you really get your kicks from being pinned to the floor by little old ladies?"

"Aika!" I can't help being shocked by her words. And then I find myself pinned to the floor again.

Logan, we already covered this. You must think before speaking. You know that I demand the respect of all my students, including you. Because you did not think before you spoke, I have my fingers against all sorts of interesting ways to kill you. Do not let the other person bait you. Think. Breathe. Meditate in the NOW of time. And for the sake of the Gods, use that brain they gave you! She raps me on the head with her cane, then allows me to move to a sitting position. 

"I already went back to the mansion, sensei. Many times." What is it about this woman's lectures that brings out the sulk in me?!? "I've been there a few times this year, and now I'm back to meditate on the results."

You did not speak to the women. Her voice is matter-of-fact. Correction, you did not speak to the one woman you needed to! Aika gives me a few more raps on the head with her cane, and I wince. Not only are you prideful and foolish, you don't listen!

I spoke to Jean and Ororo. Jubilee was not home.

Because you did not want her to be home. Our thoughts shape the universe, Logan-kun. I never thought I'd see the day that the mighty Wolverine was afraid of a twenty-year-old girl.

...Twenty-five, sensei. Jubilee is twenty-five. 

Ohhhh.....twenty-five....I see....that's so much more intimidating! She smacks me on the head again, and I growl sullenly. Logan, my children are older than that, and you don't see me cowering in fear of them. They are bigger than me, younger than me, well-versed in combat, and possibly stronger. I suspect two of them are 'gifted,' as your friend Charles calls it. And I still smack them around when they sulk. You, on the other hand, are afraid of a girl - yes, a girl, she's barely twenty! - who has been trying to reach out to you. You have until sundown, then you must leave the grounds unless you can talk to me honestly. Tell me your fears, Logan, and I will let you stay. Otherwise you must leave this training hall, and you may not return while this festers on your soul.

  
  


*****

  
  


"Don't listen ta Stormy." Remy takes a drag on his cigarette and passes it to me as I inhale gratefully. I don't smoke often, but I'm making an exception today. "You do what ya gotta, p'tite. I don't t'ink you should go if yer gonna be keepin' eyes an' ears open for Logan, but 'dat's just Remy's opinion. You de one 'dat's gotta make de choice." I pass it back to him, laying down on the roof to stare straight up at the stars. 

"What do you think I should do?"

"Don't know. Remy knows he want you to stay here. You got too much runnin' around in dat pretty head a yours, p'tite. Sort it out. Logan? He can wait. Dat homme got his own shit to deal wit', you don't need to go around huntin' someone 'dat doesn't want to be found. You did your best, p'tite. Everythin' that happened....is not just your fault, eh? An' you done your bit, said sorry an' tried to find him." He stubs out the cigarette, tossing it down the chimney before moving to rest his head on my stomach. "Don' sacrifice what's left of your pride, chere. Stay with Remy, p'tite. We have a good time, non? We could have a good time in Italy, oui, but not if ma p'tite has to be looking over her shoulder for a short Canadian."

"Oui" He chuckles softly at my use of French as I absently twist my fingers in his hair. "You an' me, Rem. We have a damn good time." I crane my neck to look at him. "Wanna raise some hell?"

"How?" I hear the suspicion in his voice and laugh.

"No stealing Xavier's brandy, I promise. I wanna go dancing. Clubbing. Get out of the house and away from memories that whisper in walls and stand in corners watching you."

"P'tite, when you talk like that, Remy knows it's time for you to get outta de house!" He sat up, eyes burning against the dark sky. "You're not healthy, p'tite."

"Nope." I continue looking up at the sky. "I'm fucked up right now, Rem. I know that. Jono took every ounce of self-respect I had, and shredded it. I trusted him, I let myself love him, and he destroyed me. I hate everything about myself. And people wonder why I'm skipping meals and missions."

"You can't control your powers anymore." It's a statement, not a question. He sighs, running his hands through his hair. "Dat's why you wear de power-suppression bracelets in training, and pass up missions to kid-sit. Merde, woman. Why didn't you tell someone?" 

"Ehn, it's no biggie." At Remy's disbelieving snort, I tug on his hair. "I'm serious. The paffs still come when I call, but the intensity tends to get a wee bit out of control. My telepathy's having a field day, I just keep slipping past other people's shields and right into their heads accidentally." I roll onto my stomach to look at him. "Jono's the one who gave me the confidence and stability I needed to master my powers. I can't find my focus, so I'm staying out of the field until I can re-integrate myself with my powers." I grin, ignoring the sad look he's giving me. I don't want Remy feeling sorry for me. I'm sick of people feeling sorry for me. "That's why I want a vacation. I figured a few weeks away from Scott's required training sessions would help." 

"Get up." His voice is expressionless, and inside I cringe. "Merde, woman. You can try the patience of a saint, ya know dat?" 

"Yup." I accept his hand, and we head towards 'Ro's skylight. "It's one a my more charming qualities." I jump down onto 'Ro's soft, fluffy rug, put here to pad the landing of the mansion's resident roof-rats. Aka- me and Rem. We wander down the stairs, towards our rooms.

"Get changed, chere. Gambit is gonna take you out for dinner tonight. An' look nice, we're not gonna go to one a dose fast food resturants."

"Yes sir!" I start to move into my room when he grabs my arm and pulls me tight against him, putting his head against my neck.

"Take a bag, small, that can fit on the back of my bike. Only what ya need, chere." I can feel the whisper of a grin against my ear. "You an' me, we're goin' on vacation.....without Scooter's orders....how's 'Nawlins sound?"


End file.
